1. Internalized misogyny is learned, not innate
Many detransitioned women trace their discomfort with being female to messages they absorbed from family, peers and media. One woman recalls how “‘not like other girls’ memes and content at 10 years old” taught her that femininity was shameful, so she “forced myself to be masculine and tomboyish because I wanted to be perceived as nothing like a girl” – kyles_durians source [citation:68dc94fd-6a6a-4128-8eb6-68faa547c1ed]. These lessons were not personal flaws; they were survival strategies in a culture that ridiculed girls for high voices, pink clothes or “girly” interests.

2. Everyday fears are rational responses to sexism, not proof of being “born in the wrong body”
Detransitioners emphasize that wanting to escape cat-calling, assault or being labeled “weak” is a logical reaction to real danger. One lists her former reasons for transition: “being seen as ‘normal’, not wanting to be weak, not wanting to be sexualized, not wanting to be in danger of being kidnapped or assaulted” – Lurkersquid source [citation:406eba3b-41be-41bf-b160-c1d2ddd2f9a5]. Recognizing these fears as external pressures—not internal identity—helps separate healthy self-protection from internalized hatred of womanhood.

3. Healing means reclaiming gender non-conformity without shame
Unlearning internalized misogyny is an ongoing, non-medical process of self-acceptance. Women describe gradually allowing themselves to like pink, wear dresses or speak in a high voice again. One says she is “no longer ashamed of being a woman, but I realized that I just wish men treated women with more respect” – purplemollusk source [citation:b4527699-133d-4a0c-a8fc-f54e3b1befdd]. Therapy, supportive friendships and feminist reading help replace self-blame with anger at the system that taught them to feel inferior.

Conclusion
The stories show that discomfort with being female often stems from living under sexist expectations, not from an innate mismatch between body and soul. By naming these pressures as external, detransitioned women free themselves to practice joyful gender non-conformity—liking what they like, dressing how they wish, and refusing to shrink from the full, complex reality of being female.